Sunday, October 31, 2010

The Track of Sand by Andrea Camilleri--reviewed by Jonathan Woods

The Track of Sand by Andrea Camilleri,

Penguin (non-classics) $14

I’ve been a fan of Andrea Camilleri’s Sicilian crime novels starring “Chief” Inspector Montalbano since the first one appeared in English in about 2002. The Track of Sand, the eleventh in the series masterfully translated by Stephen Sartarelli, does not disappoint. Fast, clever, funny and cynical. Who could ask for more?

Inspector Montalbano awakens to the sound of waves outside his window. After revisiting the fleeting images of a dream involving a woman who turns into a horse and the instructions “Mount me,” Montalbano comes fully awake. Looking out his window he discovers lying on the beach not a dead body but the bludgeoned and bloody carcass of a race horse.

The description of the dead horse and its last minutes alive as surmised by Inspector Montalbano is grotesque and horrifying. Montalbano concludes that four men beat the horse with iron bars, while two others stood by and watched. A nasty business.

Somehow the wanton slaughter of an innocent animal is more disturbing to us than a human corpse. Though we don’t hesitate to chomp down on our New York strip steaks and barbecued pork loins so beautifully displayed in the butcher’s case.

This juxtaposition of sexual innuendo and sudden brutal violence are the yin and yang of existence in Camilleri’s Sicily. Montalbano himself juggles two (or is it three) mistresses while managing to shtup a randy lady equestrian on the side. Montalbano’s dream actually comes true!
When the horse carcass disappears while Montalbano drinks a coffee and then takes a shower back in his house, Montalbano is determined to bring the sadistic killers to justice. Montalbano’s investigation takes him to a private horse race staged by Sicilian elite. Other clues point to involvement of the Mofiosi, whose fingers are inexorably entwined in the rugged hills and valleys and hard towns of Sicily. Here’s the inside scoop on getting by in Sicily:

"Family relations, even those so distant that they would no longer

be considered such in any other part of Italy, were in Sicily,

the only way to obtain information, expedite a bureaucratic procedure,

find the whereabouts of a missing person, land a job for an unemployed

son, pay less taxes, get free tickets to movies, and so many other things

that it was probably safer not to reveal to people who were not family."

The story thunders along with an occasional aside for a quick fuck in a convenient pile of hay or the enjoyment by Montalbano of a sumptuous meal prepared by his housekeeper and star chef:

“He took a shower and went out on the veranda to eat. Adelina

had made a salad of baby octopus big enough for four and some

giant prawns to be dressed only with olive oil, lemon, salt, and

black pepper.”

Or at a favorite restaurant:

“A few minutes later, there wasn’t any room left on the table for so

much as a needle…Shrimp, jumbo prawns, squid, smoked tuna,

fried balls of nunnatu, sea urchins, mussels, clams, octopus morsels

a strascinasale, octopus morsels affucati, tiny fried calamari,

calamari and squidlets tossed in a salad with orange slices and celery,

capers wrapped in anchovies, sardines a beccafico, swordfish


Be forewarned, there is no graphic sex here. For that you’ll have to reread your Henry Miller. Or check out some Italian costume porn on line. The Italian ladies always have such big soft glorious boobs. In The Track of Sand it’s all innuendo and your own erotic imagination at play.

Camilleri throws plenty of humor into his fast-paced tale, mostly of the slapstick variety. There is an ongoing riff throughout the story about the fact that Montalbano has reached that certain age when he needs to wear glasses. Tres amusant.

Before you know it, you’re turning the last page of The Track of Sand. Evil has been derailed, at least for the time being. And besides for Montalbano it’s time for lunch with a pair of his lady friends. Is he going to try for a ménage a trois? All shall not be revealed.

The Track of Sand is an enjoyable, sometimes cynical and ultimately romantic trip through the dark side of Sicilian life. If I have one complaint, it is that Montalbano is too well adjusted, a guy for whom the glass is always half full. We see darkness in Camilleri’s tale, but we never confront it face on as in one of Derek Raymond’s bleak but wonderful police procedures or in the novels of Italy’s master of noir, Niccolo Ammaniti.

This complaint aside, The Track of Sand is an entertainment to be thoroughly enjoyed in the company of several glasses of whiskey, some sliced prosciutto and a plate of olives.


Jonathan Woods resides in Dallas, Texas. His book of noir crime stories, Bad Juju & Other Tales of Madness and Mayhem, was published April 20, 2010 by New Pulp Press. New York Magazine called Bad Juju: "Hallucinatory, hilarious, imaginative noir." “Violence, sex and gonzo plot twists fuel Woods’ diverting collection of 19 stories, most set in sun-and-blood-drenched borderlands. [These stories] amp up the volume to 11…” said Publishers Weekly. Ken Bruen wrote: “With Bad Juju Woods has arrived fully fledged as a maestro…astonishing.” Jonathan's stories have appeared in 3:AM Magazine, Dogmatika, Plots with Guns, Crime Factory, Pulp Pusher, Thuglit and other Web literary zines. Jonathan's website is at The book trailer for Bad Juju is on YouTube at

Saturday, October 30, 2010

Crimefactory #5 is live and in print on Amazon

The print edition of Issue #5 of Crimefactory is now available on Amazon right HERE

New Fiction by:














With new features by:







What are you waiting for!

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Wyatt by Garry Disher--reviewed by Andrew Nette

WYATT Garry Disher Text Publishing $32.95 (AUS)

As the blurb on the back of the book says: Wyatt’s been away, now he’s back. All I’ve got to say is, it’s about bloody time.

To those of you not with the program, Wyatt is a criminal, a professional hold-up man. He’s the creation of journeyman Australian writer, Garry Disher, who wrote six Wyatt novels in the nineties in which Wyatt cut a swathe through Australia’s criminal underworld, usually as a result of a job gone wrong.

In Wyatt the score is a jewel heist, presented by an old col¬league who fancies a shot at the big league. There are multiple double crosses courtesy of the cast of characters, including a bent cop, a wannabe gangster, a stone cold French assassin and an unhinged strip¬per. There is something about the heist-gone-wrong genre of crime fiction (and movies) that seldom disappoints and Wyatt is no exception. It’s clear with¬in the first few chapters things will go wrong. You know people are going to get hurt, some fa¬tally, and most, but not all, deserve what’s coming to them. The good part is finding out just how incredibly complicated and bad it’s going to get and how the characters react to each twist and turn of the plot.

The aspect of Wyatt that push¬es it beyond a simple, albeit, well-told heist caper, is the depiction of an old style criminal trying to adapt to a rap¬idly changing world. In sparse, gritty prose, Disher brilliant¬ly delivers insights into this side of Wyatt’s existence. ‘He was an old style hold-up man: cash, jewelry, paintings. Wyatt thought about that as he cleaned his pistol, or stood at a window and watched the twilight leak away. The trouble was, technology had outstripped him. He no longer had the skills to by-pass high-tech security systems or intercept electronic transfers and was preternaturally wary of going into partnership with anyone who did. So, here he was, obliged to carry out small-scale hold-ups and burglaries.’

Wyatt’s old associates are either dead, in jail or getting careless. His carefully planned network of stashes has been used or swallowed whole by ur¬ban redevelopment. Even public phones, Wyatt’s preferred form communication with his criminal associates because they are more secure than mobile phones, are getting scarce.

It’s not just Wyatt’s criminal milieu that’s shrinking, his space, even his ability to maintain anonymity feels like it is being eroded. While earlier Wyatt novels were set in mining camps, the countryside or the Pacific islands, this latest outing largely takes place apartments, offices and back streets in metropolitan Melbourne. This gives the book a taut, claustrophobic feel.

The parallels between Wyatt and character of master thief Park¬er, created by the late Richard Stark, aka, Donald West¬lake, are obvious. Both men are more or less amoral, emotion¬ally blank career criminals who while they prefer to restrict the violence to a punch or a pistol whipping, won’t hesitate to kill if double crossed. While there are many examples of this kind of fiction in the US, Wyatt is a stand out on the Australian crime fiction scene. Wyatt’s back. Hopefully he’ll stick around this time.

Andrew Nette lived in Southeast Asia for six years in the nineties and was based in Laos, Vietnam, Cambodia and Thailand, as well as traveling around the wider region.
Nette has reviewed film and books for Crime Factory, Friday’s Forgotten Books and Back Alley Noir, the official on-line forum of the US-based Film Noir Foundation. He has also completed a crime novel titled Cambodia Darkness and Light. You can read more of his reviews at Pulp Curry

And make sure to check out Nette's interview with Garry Disher in issue #5 of Crimefactory

Now Available--Discount Noir edited by Patti Abbott and Steve Weddle

Discount Noir edited by Patti Abbott and Steve Weddle is now available from Untreed Reads. The anthology is available in all the major electronic formats. (including Kindle, which you can find right HERE. Oh, and you can find Crimefactory #5 right HERE)
Here's the full line up:

Patricia Abbott, Sophie Littlefield, Kieran Shea, Chad Eagleton, Ed Gorman, Cormac Brown, Fleur Bradley, Alan Griffiths, Laura Benedict, Garnett Elliot, Eric Beetner, Jack Bates, Bill Crider, Loren Eaton, John DuMond, John McFetridge, Toni McGee Causey, Jeff Vande Zande, James Reasoner, Kyle Minor, Randy Rohn, Todd Mason, Byron Quertermous, Sandra Scoppettone, Stephen D. Rogers, Steve Weddle, Evan Lewis, Daniel B. O'Shea, Sandra Seamans, Albert Tucher, Donna Moore, John Weagly, Keith Rawson, Gerald So, Dave Zeltserman, Dorte Hummelshoj Jakobsen, Jay Stringer, Anne Frasier, Kathleen A. Ryan, Eric Peterson, Chris Grabenstein and J.T. Ellison.

Video trailers for the anthology have been popping up left and right, but we here at Crimefactory are pretty big fans of CF favorite Daniel B. O'Shea's slightly shaky piece of film making. Make sure to check it out below.

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

The Small Town Creed By Paul D. Brazill

When You’re Growing Up In A Small Town/ You Hate It And You Want To Get Out.’ Lou Reed.

The lowest and vilest alleys in London do not present a more dreadful record of sin than does the smiling and beautiful countryside.’Sherlock Holmes

And small town America seems to be even worse. If we go by films, books and television - Twin Peaks, Blue Velvet, The Killer Inside Me, Lolita, Red Rock West - then small towns are dark and sinister places. Claustrophobic and repressive, they are much more suited to noir than the bright lights of the big city with its limitless possibilities. Noir is for losers, after all...

Maggie Greenwald’s cracking film version of Jim Thompson’s small town noir novel ‘The Kill –Off’, for example, starts with a shot of dozens of intersecting telephone lines buzzing with gossip and small town prattle, criss crossing and trapping you. Thompson’s novel is just as smothering with its multiple POVs and every character having a finger in someone else's dirty pie.

Dave Zeltserman’sSmall Crimes’ shows a man trying to escape the past but his home town keeps dragging him back like an umbilical cord tied tight around his neck!

And as for getting out ...

In Scott Phillips’ dark comedy of errors The Ice Harvest’ the hero Charlie Arglist, has big plans to get away from his small town blues and he is less than twenty-four hours away from escape but those old faces, places and habits keep hauling him back.

And look at Frank Capra’s terrifying noir classic ‘It’s A Wonderful Life’ Poor George Bailey has plans the see the world and have adventures. But will those resentful hicks of Bedford Falls let him go? No! So, he tops himself. But even in death he can’t escape. A supernatural creature appears and drags him back ‘home’! It’s like that Sartre play where hell is other people, it really is.

And scariest of all, Bill Murray starts Groundhog Day as a funny and intelligent man but after being tortured by repeating the humdrum routine of a uber-bland town he loses his spark and his wit so much that he even fancies Ali Macdowal, or whatever she’s called. Now that is chilling!


Paul D. Brazill’s story The Tut was nominated for a 2010 Spinetingler Award & he'll have a story in The Mammoth Book Of Best British Crime 2011, which is very nice indeed. His blog, You Would Say That Wouldn’t You? is here:

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

The Hilary Davidson Challenge

The always crafty Steve Weddle is throwing down with another flash fiction challenge. Here's what the red headed stranger of crime fiction had to say:

Not long ago I had the chance to chat up Hilary Davidson about her debut, THE DAMAGE DONE. This is one of my favorite books this year -- taut, determined, and so confident. The podcast is here.

My copy of THE DAMAGE DONE is signed by Ms Davidson herself. I don't have it in front of me, but I seem to remember it says something like, "Hey, you're not as big a jerk as everyone says, Hilary."

Jealous? Don't be. You, too, can have a SIGNED copy of THE DAMAGE DONE. Ms Davidson has graciously agreed to sign a copy for me to give away.

So, here's the deal:

Flash fiction. 500-ish words.

As Ms Davidson bleeds Canadian red and keeping in mind the book's title, the story must include something -- lyric, title, wardrobe choice -- to do with Neil Young.

And that's not all. Because I'm a sadist, the story must also include something to do with the shadowy ghost in the book, Ms Ava Gardner.

Post your story link here by November 3 (Wednesday) and Ms Davidson will have a chance to sign and personalize your very own special copy at NoirCon.

Recap: 500 words. Post a link here. Neil Young AND Ava Gardner. Yeah, that does sound tough. Maybe I am as big a jerk as they say.

Good luck and get moving. Rust never sleeps.

Make sure to post your stories right HERE at Channel Noir

Interview-- Libby Cudmore and Matthew Quinn Martin

I was impressed with Libby Cudmore the moment I first bumbled upon one of her stories in Thrillers, Killers, 'n' Chillers. Her stark, realistic style of writing sets her apart from most of her peers. And when Cam told me that she would be next up in SHIFT WORK: (Our serialized fiction section) I was pretty excited that A Double Hit of Victor & Sheila would be appearing in our pages. But along with writing more than her fair share of impressive stories, Cudmore also pens stories with New York based writer Matthew Quinn Martin. The following interview was originally conducted for this years "Conversations with the Bookless" interviews over at Spinetingler Magazine, unfortunately Libby got it back to me a couple of weeks after the series ended and I've been sitting on it ever since, not really knowing what to do with it. So I figured, what the hell, I might as well run it over at DAY LABOR. Hope you enjoy.

Libby Cudmore and Matthew Quinn Martin

Why do you write?

Libby: Because I didn’t get into drama school. Seriously though, it’s like asking why I breathe. I like breathing, I’m good at it. Same goes with writing.

Matthew: I guess a better question would be, “why don’t I stop?” But yeah, I seem to be good at it, and while I don’t always like it…I usually like being done. That and I didn’t get into drama school.

What is the value and purpose of short fiction in Mystery/Crime fiction for you? For you personally and overall for the form and genre?

Libby: It’s a good thing to read over coffee and donuts. A nice way to start the day.

Matthew: As a writer, I think the short form is a place to let lose with ideas and concepts that might be too dark for a full-length work. After 400 pages, the reader can get pretty invested with a protagonist, so it gets harder to A) kill them off, B) have them act in an “unheroic” way.

What do you most value in the fiction you love?

Libby: Style over substance. Just write a good story.

Matthew: The moments that pop up months later at the oddest times (but in a good way). So much fiction is instantly forgettable. So you know when it sticks it’s either totally fantastic…or a laugh-out-loud shit sandwich (which can also be fun in small doses…but very frustrating)

What’s your favorite story written by someone else?

Libby: Raymond Chandler’s The Long Goodbye, hands down. Jurassic Park takes a strong second place. Although I’ve got a major lit-crush on “Command Performance” by Matthew Quinn Martin.

Matthew: That’s tough…here’s a list:

Novel: Wiseblood by Flannery O’Connor

Movie: The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension written by Earl Mac Rauch

Short Story: Stephen King’s “The Last Rung on the Ladder” (still gets me every time I think about it)

Novella: Miss Lonelyhearts by Nathanael West

Flash Fiction: Unplanned by Libby Cudmore

Who are your influences and what is your most unlikeliest influence?

Libby: Chandler always and, early on, Frank Miller. I’ve grown out of that phase, thankfully, and now write stuff with meaning instead of just vigilante stand-ins. Warren Zevon, Tom Waits and Morrissey are big influences too . . . but my most unlikely influence? Anne Bonny, the notorious lady pirate—above my desk I have her quote, “If you’d fought like a man, they wouldn’t be hanging you like a dog.” She said that to her husband on his way to the gallows. The woman meant business. I read that when I get that writer’s panic and remember that cowardice gets you nowhere.

Matthew: Joe Eszterhas (I’m serious), Flannery O’Connor, Jim Thompson, Stephen King, Michael Crichton, Walker Percy, Frank Herbert, Douglas Adams, Russell Hoban, Terry Pratchett, Charles Bukowski, Nathaneal West, Melvin Van Peebles, Derrick Jensen, Dostoevsky. Guess there aren’t a lot of “contemporary voices” up there, but when it comes to dialog and plot-weave/pacing I also lift a lot from TV (especially the think-tanks behind shows with a season or multi-season arc like Lost, LA Law, or Grey’s Anatomy).

My most unlikely influence is heavy metal…not any particular band or song…just nuclear-strength, melt-your-face-off M.E.T.A.L. …which I like to blast when I’m writing against a deadline.

What issues or ideas about fiction have been foremost in your mind of late?

Libby: So much of crime fiction is all style and no substance. It’s written by a bunch of fedora-sporting hipsters who pile violence upon sex upon violence without giving any thought to consequences—as a result, their stories are dull and their characters are flat. If I wanted Raymond Chandler, I’ll just read Chandler, thanks.

Matthew: I’d like to ditto what Libby said. Sure, reading about dark subjects can be fun, but writers should take care that what they are writing become little more than mental pollution (ahem…teen-vampire books that equate abuse with true love…cough cough).

Who is the best short story writer that people haven’t gotten hip to yet?

Libby: Matthew Quinn Martin

Matthew: See…if you’d have asked me this a few months ago, I’d have said Libby Cudmore, but now with Derringer nominations and the like, it seems like people are already hip to her.

What do you like most about short fiction?

Libby: It forces you to really think about what you’re writing. So many amateur writers act like it’s so impossibly difficult to write a 700 page novel—it’s not. Time consuming? Yes. But any idiot can go on for 200 pages about the Great Knight Galian the Oily-Chested and His Mighty Sword of True Justice. To get character, setting and conflict across in 5,000 words? Not so easy. It took me a long, long time to learn to write a solid short story, but my Derringer nomination tells me I must be doing something right!

Matthew: …sorry, my mind was on how I was going to explain the difference between an “sword of justice” and a “sword of TRUE justice.” Seriously though, once again I agree with Libby.

Where are you, right now, as you’re writing these answers?

Libby: In my office at the job I’m about to be fired from

Matthew: On my couch eating the last of my biscuits.

When did you start writing short fiction and what prompted you to do so?

Libby: I did the college-novelist thing all through undergrad because I was self-important idiot. When I was living in Brooklyn the year after graduation, I had a conversation with my friend Mike regarding my creepy roommate and Mike replied, “If he tries anything, I’ll drive down there and kick his ass.” I all but hung up on him and scrawled down a 4-page story which became “The Carpool” (Hardboiled issue #41). Something had clicked—this is how you write a short story. And I’ve been writing them ever since.

Matthew: I came to prose from screenwriting and needed a writing sample for my MFA application. I was riding back from the eye-doctor’s and a couple of b-boys came on the train and started breakdancing. That’s what gave me the idea for “Command Performance” which is out in the current issue of Harvard’s Transition Magazine.

Of all of your stories, which is your favorite; the one that showcases best your abilities?

Libby: I’m really proud of “Unplanned,” which was nominated for a Derringer. “Spare Change” was good too, and I wish more people had read it. It’s still out there, and it’s fabulous.

Matthew: That’s a toss up between two as yet unpublished stories (“Box” and “You Never Knew My Heart”). The ones that are out there…jeez, I can’t pick. “Hazardous Material” at Aphelion is fun, and so is “Chickens” (Thuglit)…well maybe that one isn’t fun exactly.

Do you have any short story publications forthcoming?

Libby: Thrilling Detective keeps saying they’re going to publish my story “The PI’s Wife” but they haven’t updated their site in almost a year. Crime Factory picked up another story with the same characters, titled “Midnight to 6AM” which should be coming out in issue 5.

Matthew: The Land Bridge is reprinting “Hazardous Material.” Other than that, nope. But I’ve got a new batch of submissions going, so keep your eyes peeled (not literally)

I understand you two have a completed a manuscript? Would you mind sharing an excerpt from it?

From Holding Tank--

I parked myself on one of the empty stools. Within moments I could feel the numbness spreading across my backside. Even a coke-skinny hipster’s butt would hang off those pie-plated like saddlebags. I set down my bag with a heavy clank. Everybody’s got their way of passing the time between setups. Trashy novels, tabloids, crosswords, sudoku, or just napping.

Not me. I’d slept away enough of my life already. I was five lessons from completing my Worldwide School of Investigation Online training course. Who better to play a detective on TV than someone who’s a detective in real life? I’ve always been a fiend for research. Old-school method actor to the core.

Not that I ever expected to use my PI skills. I didn’t have much interest in skip-traces and domestic surveillance that the handbook was prepping me for, but I’ll admit to getting swept up in some of the romantic bullshit. I could just imagine myself behind one of those oak and wavy glass doors with my name stenciled on it in gold leaf, sitting at a cluttered desk while a slim cigarette smoldered away in an overflowing ashtray. Okay, maybe no cigarettes––Beeman chewing gum and a silver flask filled with Moxie. A client would walk in and I could run a hardboiled inner monologue, this himbo’s hamster had come off his wheel, but he’s got a set of shoulders I could stack my library on.

If all went according to plan, by this time next month I would no longer be just Rayelee Flynn, fake detective on TV––but Rayelee Flynn, certified Private Investigator, playing a fake detective on TV.

Trailer for Apostle Rising by Richard Godwin

Richard Godwin, whose story "Face off" appears in issue #5 of Crimefactory has released a trailer for his debut novel, Apostle Rising. (Which appears March, 2011)
You can check out right HERE at Godwin's official website

Monday, October 25, 2010

A Memo from the management by Keith Rawson

Welcome to issue 5 of Crimefactory and to the official blog of Crimefactory, Day Labor. I’m going to be honest with you, I’m probably more excited about this issue than any other we’ve produced in the past year and when you see the line up you’ll understand why.

We have new Fiction by:

Charlie Williams

Sandra Ruttan

Stephen Blackmoore

Paul D. Brazill

Libby Cudmore

Patti Abbott

Jim Winter

Matthew C. Funk

John Weagly

Chad Rohrbacher

Eric Lundy

Richard Godwin

Calvin Seen

With new features by

Andrew Nette

Gary Lovisi

Eric Beetner

The Nerd of Noir

With featured reviews by

Jimmy Callaway and Audrey Homan

Issue #5 is enormous! It’s over the top! And, yes it’s in print.


Well, why do we do anything at Crimefactory? Simple answer, because we can. We went print because the technology is there for us to easily use, so why not use it?

Yes, we will still be giving the PDF away.

Yes, we’ll only still be charging .99 cents for the Kindle download.

(No, we’re not going to get greedy and start charging $2.99)

But over the past year I’ve received dozens of e-mails and Facebook messages expressing an interest in a print edition. So around issue 3, Cam and I started discussing the possibility of putting it together. I ran some test issues to start experimenting with the format and before we knew it, we decided to set our sights on putting out the print edition with issue 5. Putting it all together was a pain in the ass. Liam had to completely reformat the PDF, design the cover within all the specifications, had to reformat and re-correct a dozen times until we got it right.

And Liam did it all while working 11 hour days.

Goes without saying that Liam is my hero for pulling it all together


Yes, I plan on providing contributors copies. I believe in making sure the author gets “paid”. Eventually, if we can sell enough copies, I’d like to pay our authors semi-pro or professional level rates, but until then you’re going to have to deal with receiving a copy of the issue you appear in.


The deal is that website blog was lame

The second part of the deal is even though we have a strong presence on the web through the website, Facebook, and Twitter, I wanted to be even bigger and stronger by providing regular content under the Crimefactory banner. Yes, that means regular reviews, interviews, editorials, features, rants, whatever. For awhile I’ll be intermingling new content with reprint material from the magazine you may have missed. I’ll keep doing this until we put together a semi-regular team of bloggers, writers, and reviewers.

So, how I want you think of the blog is how we think of the magazine.

Cam, Liam, and I have always thought of the zine as the punk rock Crimespree

Well, I want you to think of the blog as the anarchist Rap Sheet.

By the way, folks, the blog is a work in progress, as I update the content, I’ll be updating links and what not, so please be patient..

Anyway, that’s all I’ve got for today.

Make sure to download or order your copy of Crimefactory today!


(Or, you know, in the next couple of days or week or so)


Feel free to follow the blog, it makes me feel all warm and tingly when you do the whole Google connect thing.